I hate money. I really, really do. Money has been the biggest stressor in my life all of my life. My parents never seemed to have enough money and debt has always been a big part of our lives. Now my husband and I struggle financially, which I never wanted and in fact was trying hard to avoid.
I wish we were in a society where money didn’t matter. I would actually prefer a bartering system. I need food, let me write your article for you. I feel like that would put everyone on a more level playing ground. I know it wouldn’t work and I know that money isn’t going anywhere, I just really hate it. I’m tired of struggling day-to-day and wondering if our bills are going to be paid.
I’m tired of not feeling happy. I have moments of happiness, but I feel like most of the time I’m just waiting for things to change, to get better before I can be happy. And I know that’s not what God intends.
“I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.” – Philippians 4:11-12
But that is where trusting God comes in. I could worry all day, lose sleep at night, become ill and stressed to the point where I’m physically incapable of working…but what good would that do? Worry is what put my grandmother in the grave, and I refuse to let it do the same to me.
Do you know, when we worry we are not trusting God? I say every day, “God, I trust You to take care of us, to provide for our needs, to do what we can’t.” Then I turn around and go, “Ohmygosh, how are we going to pay our bills? How can I make more money? Do I need to get a job outside the home and forget my book and blog and everything else the Lord has called me to do, simply to solve our money problem?”
That is not trusting God. Not at all. I’m trying to take things into my own hands and solve them all on my own. And I can’t. I don’t have a college degree, which means I can only get minimum-wage jobs. While that may cover some of our bills, that’s no career. That’s not a life I want to live, struggling in meaningless jobs until hopefully something better happens. I honestly can’t solve our problems myself, and neither can my husband as much as I’d like to put all the pressure on him to support me.
“For it is God who works in you to will and to act in order to fulfill His good purpose.” – Philippians 2:13
God is the only one who can truly take care of us. Not just my husband and I, but you as well, dear reader! Jesus walks beside us every single day. He brings the blessings. He gives the favor. It is only through Him that we can prosper and succeed in life. And I can promise you this: God does not want us to struggle and suffer every day. He wants us to walk in joy and peace every day, keeping our eyes on Him and knowing that He will take care of us.
“The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.” – John 10:10
I have to say, I’m honestly glad that my husband and I don’t love money. Greed is a huge downfall and making money should never be our focus in life. Money might be a necessity, but it isn’t our purpose. Right now, my purpose is to help everyone who comes to this blog, to show them that there is hope and unconditional love in Jesus Christ. And my purpose is to take care of my husband, support and love him, and take care of my home.
“For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil. Some people, eager for money, have wandered from the faith and pierced themselves with many griefs.” – 1 Timothy 6:10
No, I refuse to live every day in worry, anxiety, doubt, and fear. They are useless, worthless emotions that won’t get me any closer to the life I want to live. They don’t bring me closer to my God, and they put a lot of strain on my marriage. I choose to trust in God today. I choose to believe that He will provide for our needs. We will do what we can do, what we believe God is telling us to do until He tells us differently, and trust that He will do what we can’t do.
“And my God will meet all your needs according to the riches of His glory in Christ Jesus.” – Philippians 4:19
He is showing me more and more ways to make money from home, for which I am grateful. One great site that you might want to check out is Frugal Fanatic. That’s a great way to learn how to make some extra money from home, plus they give you tools to plan out a budget. I’m thankful that the Lord always provides new opportunities.
I know all of you are struggling financially too. Tell me about your struggles and what God is doing in your life in the comments below!